chapter books

Is Imposter Syndrome Just Part of the Process?

This post was originally sent through my author newsletter on December 9th, 2022. To subscribe to my newsletter and receive up-to-date news, musings, and more, click HERE.

Recently, I posted a slightly vulnerable Instagram caption about experiencing imposter syndrome. I'd spent the past couple days trying to draft out a virtual writing workshop I will be leading (Writing Fun and Feelings in Chapter Books) in January for the Metro NY chapter of the Society of Children's Book Writers & Illustrators. I'd brainstormed pages and pages of ideas and tips and recommendations, but it wasn't coming together as a workshop. It didn't flow.

I was floundering. 

Meanwhile, I'd just seen a post in a chapter book writers Facebook group I'm a member of alerting people to this upcoming workshop. "Anyone going to this?" the poster asked. "It sounds great!" 

The workshop did sound great—based on the synopsis I'd pitched months ago. (Yes, I pitched this workshop! All of the stress I've felt about it is completely my own fault!) But as of last Friday, I simply couldn't make it work. That's where the imposter syndrome slithered in. A useful topic idea, sure to be informative and engaging...but what makes you think you're the right person to teach it? 

I hit a wall. I closed the document on my computer. I didn't look at it over the weekend, or during my workday on Monday. And then, on Tuesday (admittedly after a bit of nervous procrastinating), I opened up a new presentation on Google Slides. I started trying to find the bullet points in the mess of brainstorming I'd done last week. I looked for themes and highlights. Big-picture advice, and then the more granular tips and specific examples and personal anecdotes that would fit under each umbrella. 

By Wednesday, I had an outline—which meant I had a workshop. 

I still have a lot more to do, of course. Now that I know the basic structure of my talk, I need to script out what I want to say for each slide and bullet point. And then I need to loop in my Class Critters editor; the workshop will be a conversation between the two of us, albeit with me taking the lead. I'm sure she'll have some points I haven't thought of. And then...I have to practice the thing, so I'm not looking at notes the whole workshop! 

But right now, a week after feeling like there was no way I could do this—I know I can. I just have to make it happen. 

Why share this process? Because it is not at all uncommon, in my writing career as well as for just about every writer (and creator) that I know. 

Every single time I revise a novel—and my husband will attest to this!—there is a point where I throw my hands in the air and shout, "I broke the book!" It is officially too much of a mess to clean up. Too difficult of a puzzle to solve. 

Until, eventually, I figure it out. 

This happens with my freelance writing too. My dance articles, for instance: some of them practically write themselves (I've been doing this for 15 years, after all). But then, every once in a while, I encounter a story that just will...not...come...together. The interviews were productive. I know my subject matter. But it won't turn into a cohesive, concise story. 

Until, eventually, I figure it out. 

Why would crafting a writing workshop be any different? 

And yet, in that moment of crisis, I'm always certain that this will be the one I can't figure out. This will be the deadline I miss, or the piece of writing that gets rejected—or the workshop that flops. So I'm documenting my latest dive into imposter syndrome here, as a reminder to myself the next time I'm in the weeds: I do know what I'm doing. I've been here before, and I've found my way through to the other side. 

~Kathryn

What I'm: 

Reading: I finally got around to reading The Marvellers by Dhonielle Clayton, after having it on my list for months—and it did not disappoint! Dhonielle has written a vibrant new take on the magical school genre. Ella Durand is the first Conjuror child allowed to attend the Arcanum Institute for Marvellers. As she's trying to prove that her magic is every bit as valid as theirs—that she fits in and belongs at the Institute—a mystery unfolds involving a criminal from decades ago escaping from prison. With whimsical writing, an evocative and fully fleshed-out world, and diverse characters, this series is definitely going to be a new kidlit classic. 

Watching: "Wednesday" on Netflix. There were a few plot holes, and the dark tone was pretty different than past "kooky" entries in the Addams Family canon, but overall, we liked it! 

Listening to: Did you know there is a Hanukkah rip-off/parody of "Shake it Off"? I found this when my daughter wanted to listen to Hanukkah music the other night. Here it is. You're welcome.  

Loving: This picture of "Santu," as lovingly depicted by my 5-year-old.  

Let's Talk About "Writing for Hire"

This post was originally sent through my author newsletter on October 21st, 2022. To subscribe to my newsletter and receive up-to-date news, musings, and more, click HERE.

This week, for the first time in a very, very long time, I started writing something completely new. I opened a blank Scrivener document. I wrote "1" at the top of the first page. And then I stared at the blank screen.

And stared. And stared.

Starting a new book from scratch is a bit daunting. It's hard to know exactly where to begin—and in many cases, writers begin at the wrong spot entirely and end up cutting the first few pages or even chapters down the line. I've heard this referred to as "clearing your throat," a.k.a. getting some stuff out of your system and out of your way before reaching the nitty-gritty of the story. Some level of throat-clearing is necessary, of course. Chances are, you aren't going to write the perfect first line on Day One, so you might as well write forward. It's better to get words on the page than to be paralyzed from the start.

If I were working on something that's entirely for me, this early-drafting phase would be like messing around. Playing in the sandbox. Seeing what feels right.

But, as it turns out, this new thing I'm starting is not entirely for me. It's an audition for a write-for-hire project, a sample chapter that will help the editor and the creator of the project decide whether I'm the right writer to make their vision a reality. So, strangely, a lot more is riding on this first chapter than if I were starting a book of my own. Even if it were to change entirely in edits, it has to be solid enough now to land me the job!

I've auditioned for a write-for-hire gig before, and I've also done some freelance ghostwriting. The previous WFH tryout was back in 2018, and it was for a chapter book series about animals that had various jobs. I wrote a sample about Chef Cheetah and his search for his missing mozzarella. (I think I can talk about this now because, as far as I know, this series never actually became a thing? At least, not in the way it was described to me at the time...) After I'd turned in my sample, I found out that at least one other children's book author in my immediate network had also auditioned for the job. Neither of us got it...and, as I said, I don't know if the series ever saw the light of day.

But! My agent loved what I'd written. She suggested I try my hand at an original chapter book idea. I was into that suggestion—and what resulted was Tally Tuttle Turns into a Turtle. So, while that particular WFH audition was a bust, it did ultimately send my career in a new direction!

On the ghostwriting front, I spent 2019-2021 working with an adult science-fiction writer who self-published a series on Amazon. Some ghostwriting jobs involve writing books from scratch, but in this case, he wrote first-drafts that I then edited and enhanced, in some instances almost doubling the word count. I worked on seven books with him, over three years, and each time he trusted me to fill in more story and characterization. (The first book was already published when I got my hands on it; it hadn't been selling well and he wanted someone to beef it up. By book seven, he was sending me slim chapters one or two at a time, as he wrote them, and I fleshed them out into a full story arc!)

With the ghostwriting gig, my name is not attached to the work. I was hired in a strictly behind-the-scenes role. And that's fine! These books are this guy's thing, and I don't need credit! I was paid for my time and effort.

With writing-for-hire, there are a number of ways in which the writer can be acknowledged and/or credited (or not). You might be working with a celebrity author, and that's whose name will be on the cover. (Yours won't.) Or you might be published under a pseudonym. Or you might be listed as a "with"—i.e. BIG NAME AUTHOR, with Kathryn Holmes. Or you might get to be the actual author, on the cover and title page! Contracts (and fees) will vary.

What matters with writing-for-hire is that the concept and outline/story are someone else's intellectual property. Someone else—a celebrity, a book packager, the publisher—has an idea that they are hiring you to execute. You might have some freedom within that template, but the book is not your baby. Someone else has the final say on what gets sent to print.

A lot of authors do write-for-hire work in addition to publishing their own books, and a lot of books are published each year that you might not know are IP projects! (IP = intellectual property, for those paying attention.) It's not just Star Wars and Marvel novelizations—some books that have original concepts fall into this category, simply because the publisher or a book packager had an idea that they hired a writer to write.

So back to my sample chapter! I can't say what it's for, other than that the client is a nonfiction writer who wants to branch into fiction. I don't know if I'll get the contract, and if I do, whether I'll be able to speak about it publicly. But I wanted to write about it here because WFH is an increasingly large part of the publishing game—and a great way for authors to earn some extra money in between solo deals.

That said, I really do want this—the subject matter and ethos of the project are a great fit for me—so please cross your fingers the client likes what I've done!

Until next week...

~Kathryn

The Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators is running its BookStop promotion until December 5th! I've got pages up for all three Class Critters books. You can check them out here:

Chances are, if you're a regular reader of this newsletter, you have already bought a book or two...but if you're so inclined, you could share these BookStop links with your friends and family! You can also leave a comment in the Guest Book on each page, to tell anyone who browses the BookStop how great the Class Critters kids are.

We're launching into holiday gift-giving season, and BOOKS are one of the best gifts any kid can receive!

What I'm:

Reading: As promised last week, I'm reading the third American Royals book, Rivals. (To be honest, I've been too busy to do a ton of reading this week, so I'm not very far into it! But that has nothing to do with the quality of the book.)

Watching: "Floor is Lava" inexplicably has a third season on Netflix. Even more inexplicably...my husband and I have already blazed through it. ;)

Dancing to: Who remembers Ray LaMontagne's peak in the 2000s? My dance teacher brought another blast from the past (i.e. my mid-20s...) into class this week by setting choreography to "Duet," sung by Rachel Yamagata and LaMontagne. I definitely felt some feelings to this song circa 2008...

Loving: It finally feels like fall!